Chapter Twenty-Two: There are some words on these pages.

So, here's everything you need to know about this chapter, really.

1. Bella is sad that people are eaten by vampires.
2. The secretary knows people are eaten by vampires, but hopes they'll someday take her vampginity rather than having her for dinner.
3. Bella is happy to be in the company of her sparkle god again.
4. Alice likes stealing cars, and wants her own 911 Turbo.
5. They fly back to Forks.
6. Rosalie is sorry.
7. Bella is sleepy.
8. Charlie is angry.

There: you just learned everything this chapter has to offer in about 67 words. It took me 15 pages of descriptions of Edward's chest and moaning and crying and airplanes and sportscars to get that information for you. FIFTEEN PAGES. I hate you, chapter twenty-two.